My former coach, Mary Gregory, has written a book called Ego. I’ve started reading it, and you might think that the book is about getting you to become more self-centred and selfish, but actually, it breaks down how your ego works in strange and surprising ways! Below are the different ego traps she identifies:
1. Do it!
I sometimes find myself trying to sort stuff out as quickly as possible. This can be because I want to build momentum and get as quickly to impact as possible; sometimes, it can even be just getting something visible achieved that day.
By prioritising what’s most essential and urgent, I regain control and ensure I work on the most impactful tasks. This approach also allows me to book time further ahead to sort issues I don’t need to tackle today, making me more efficient.
2. Solo flight
While I’ve always been collaborative, at the start of my career, I thought I could do everything without needing help. However, I soon discovered the joy of working with others, which has made me feel more connected and engaged in my work.
To tackle this, I start by identifying what I’m best placed to do — including where this means not playing a leading role — and what others can bring to a project.
3. I’m alright, jack
I’ve always asked for feedback and understanding of how others feel, but sometimes, when I’ve snowed under, I don’t do it as regularly.
By sharing feedback as much as possible immediately after the activity and asking for input during check-in sessions, I ensure that everyone’s voice is heard and valued, making them feel more included in the process.
4. Blaming others
I rarely blame others (let me know if I do!). In fact, I often blame myself first. But if you find yourself in that situation, before you blame someone or yourself, create ways to share lessons learned through show-and-tells or retros.
5. People pleasing
I love to please and always want to ensure I meet other people’s needs, and I feel guilty if I haven’t acted according to my values.
To tackle this, I try to share my needs with my manager or coach and discover other people’s needs and motivations.
6. Never good enough
During my career, I’ve learned that there isn’t enough time to be a perfectionist, but that doesn’t stop me from trying!
To tackle this, I will share early versions of work, like a skeleton slide deck or storyboard, to enable people to provide feedback and steer
